The Dark Shade!

In the woods I walked to the song of the birds, to the rustle of the leaves and to the howls of the breeze.But, I knew I was lost, lost in the exquisite marvels that the woods offered.It was then that I saw something that startled me and it was the may or may not be haunted graveyard.But I certainly knew that it’s terrible beauty would haunt me for life.The graves were kept under the shades of the trees that were probably older than my grandpa.But it’s features never resembled him,but to that of a young man who stood tall and stout.Young men of the world are proud to be sheltering their families who lived, but these trees were proud to be sheltering the men who had died.As I went closer to the grave I discovered, that those graves belonged to people who lived hundreds of years before.And all these facts together made me avid, for knowing more about the baffling sight that I was witnessing.A graveyard is something esoteric and I guess I could savour it.

In one of the graves it was written ”we will meet on that beautiful shore.” It belonged to a lady whose name was Elizabeth.And,then I felt that sudden urge in me, which arose to know if this lady ever knew that a soul like mine had badly wanted to know if such a shore existed or not.At that the very moment, I knew that the lines inscribed on this stone had given my quest the words that it was thirsting for.What is it after death?I don’t fear death.What I fear is ‘what is it after death?’Is it a beautiful nothing or a beautiful something?What I quest for is, what had happened to a million people but still remains a mystery to another million.I want to know, what the existence of the soul after death means or is meant to be.

As I moved to the next grave, I found that it belonged to a man who had died in 1932.I found his tomb line covered with the stains of sluttish time.I picked up a wooden stick and rasped hard on the stone.And then I found, the hidden words appearing in front of me one by one ”as long as I’m remembered; I will not be forgotten”, it belonged to a man whose name was Theodre. And then I was lost wondering what this man meant to his loved ones and is he was remembered by any.These lines dawned my insides asking, if I was the only person who knew that such a man named Theodre existed.A man who is not related to me, but a man whose words questioned the purpose of my existence.Do we exist to be remembered?Or, do we once exist and die so that everyone forgets us except the soul which we once owned.Maybe a time will come when ,even the greatest of the greatests go forgotten and their doings, unsaid.Even nature plays along with time to wipe out all the bits of evidence that murmur the existence of a man who once lived.The nature was not shy to erase the tomb lines which was the last mark of a once existed Theodre and it can be no different for us.

As I moved to the next grave , I found that this grave belonged to Agustus and under his cross it was inscribed,”I knew this would happen.”But, this left me thinking what had happened?What did he mean?Does he mean the death that has doomed him or the new way of existing that he have found?Maybe he knew that he would be left in a state remembered by none or it must be that he knew that the lines inscribed on his tomb would lead a confused girl into a more confusing pit. Wherever he is or whatever he has become, is he aware of the state that he is engulfed in?Does his soul exist as something or someone to know,to understand and to feel what he has become?Does the ‘happening’ that he had mentioned leave everyone into a beautiful nothingness?

And, again as I moved along to the next grave I found that the grave belonged to a man whose name was Basil and the lines inscribed in his tomb were ”just whisper my name in your heart and I will be there next to you.”This line filled my heart with more hollowness.I knew that these lines would make me crave to know ‘how beautiful is it over there?’If what he said is true does his soul wander around me when I write down my thoughts and fears?Maybe, his loved ones wanted his soul around them, but I’m a stranger why would I want him around me?Does the dead get the opportunity to be around those,who they love?Is this how they fill the hollowness that fill them?After death, does man’s soul exist to hear this whisper,that of his loved ones?What if these whispers die…where do they find solace then?

For a little girl like me these thoughts regarding life after death is too much to bear.To find a simple solution to it, just feel yourself breathing and existing.And, why bother about something that you are not sure of?Maybe, it is something necessary and beautiful!

When I walk down the hill and look back what I see is not a haunted graveyard, but an unhidden shade where the souls yearn, to arouse the living men to find the hidden mysteries of the beautiful shore that may or may not exist!!


A dream…

The little platinum band, out of which a little clear diamond stood protruding, gleamed on her ring finger. The sun, peeking from behind the curtains of the small window, seemed to fall on it, refracting its single ray into a bunch of glimmering white rays. She looked at her naked self, seemingly mocking her from behind the mirror. Her thick brown hair, let down, loose curls touching the lowest nook of her back. Her captivating curves, which once took his breath away, now plumper…or had they shrunk? She couldn’t tell. She gently removed that silver band from her fingers and placed them on the white porcelain wash area. She couldn’t bear the weight of that heavy stone anymore. When had it become so heavy? She wasn’t sure… She had stripped for a quick shower but now she lost the heart to fulfill such a droning routine. She wanted something fresh, something out of her daily routine or out of her vacation routine as well for that matter… Of course, this was not a matter of love. She loved him and she knew that. But then why did she feel this overpowering urge to experience something new?…Something or someone that’s not him… Hadn’t he given her everything she could ever imagine? A beautiful house, the plan of which she herself drew up, two angelic children, enough and more money to buy herself whatever she wanted….But…How could you possibly expect a bird to be happy even if it had built the cage itself? How could the bird be happy to raise her children inside the cage, only to see them master the art of flight and leave her alone once again? How could the bird be happy if she could not buy out her freedom?

Yes. She would have to leave this wretched cage if she wanted to be happy… If she wanted to be free of the weight of her seemingly beautiful hangman’s noose. But how could she? The caring mother of two and the loving wife of one. Leaving would be cowardice. She knew that…But…

No. She wouldn’t. She possibly couldn’t. She dressed quickly and stepped into the discomfort of her comfortably beautiful cage.

The wind howled in her ears as she felt herself searing through the paper white sky. Strands of her loose hair flapped upwards and occasionally onto her face as well. The fall was long. She took in a deep breath despite the air that was being forced into her lungs. She felt euphoric as she closed her eyes, willing herself to imagine the beautifully fresh and new horizon to which she was heading to. She touched the ground with a loud crash. Blood spilled out of her once perfect skull, oozing out the beautiful red warmth. All the while, the expensive ring with the little shiny stone sat gleaming on the immaculately white countertop….

It was all but a dream.